Omentum

All of the sudden I have gotten even bigger. Seriously. I cannot hold IT in any longer. I have been a big girl for quite a while but have always been able to suck it in, somewhat. Of course, noone could notice that I was holding anything in, but it's what big people do. I cannot do it all now. In fact, it is painful and my abdominal muscles send up pain messages to my brain.

My big stomach changed shapes. I remember waking up one day and noticing and saying, to my stomach, "what the heck?!" During this time I was completely stressed out and either eating a whole lot, or not at all for long periods of time.

My metabolism is COMPLETELY shot. I was used to being productive at night and eating lunch at night; after nine and half years worth of night shifts.
The funny thing is, and I'm totally serious, I have been working out. I am! I have gone to the YMCA a good three to four and sometimes FIVE times a week for about five months.

Every time there is a diet commercial for Jenny Craig or NutraSystems or Weight Watcher's the girls say, "call mom, call!" It is depressing and hilarious at the same time. But not enough to laugh.

I watched an old episode of Oprah on my DVR today. It was Dr. Oz telling everyone how to lose weight, blah, blah, blah. He had this organ on the table to show everyone. It was called the Omentum. He described what it did, and why this particular sample was so big. And why that was bad.
"Mom! That's why your stomach is big. It's your omentum."

"Yes, it's my omentum! Why, it's huge!!"

At least, now I know.