Hey Baby!

I am a large, middle aged, married woman of three...


I GOT ASKED OUT! BY A STRANGER! Well, I guess it wOUld have to be a stranger... but you know what I mean. I guess I should be OUtraged, but I wasn't. I was flattered and even BLUSHED! I don't know what was wrong with "the guy" but he was NOT kidding or being rude. He totally made my day! Well, had me thinking the rest of yesterday, last night and today. I wasn't going to blog about it because I could hardly believe it myself but I am so flabbergasted that I just had to. Know what I mean? And yes, I told Ira about it. He was like, Hmph. He doesn't say much, but "hmph" cOUld mean a lot. Okay, this is what happened...

Don't laugh because I have to give it in verbatim form because, well, that's just the way I talk.

Okay...

Oh, let me say, also, this does in NO WAY mean that Ira and I are having troubles or that I am "looking" or even in any WAY, SHAPE or FORM putting myself in some sort of a position to be "HIT ON". This is just what happened to me. Okay? OKAY! So stop looking at me that WAY! Geeeeesh, the blushing is there again...
okay, the STORY!

I was at Target, getting a few things that were on sale. Mckenna, McLaine and I.J. WERE WITH ME...

So, I'm standing there in the line putting the things on the little belt thingy for the check-out thingy... the kids were with me, then they asked if they cOUld have a drink. I said they cOUld and to get me a water. The drink thingy was not in OUr line, so they went to the line one or two over, all three of them.

HE SAYS, to ME! , "You're a nice mom."
me: "well, you caught me on a good day" I laughed.
the guy: "no, no, I can tell. You have a nice way of handling them. I saw you earlier in the toy area"
me: (still trying to be funny and make light conversation)"Oh, I know! They were driving me nuts over there. Christmas time is so hard, they want everything!"
the guy: "Well, you turned them down in a nice way."
me: "Well, they just WANT EVERYTHING this time of year."

Okay, at this point, I was thinking this guy was being way too nice. So it made me a little uncomfortable. But, did I mention, no, I didn't... He was a VERY good looking, yOUng man... Like someone I'd pick OUt for one of the college girls that come over and eat dinner with us on Sundays. He really was cute! Nicely dressed, had on one of those gorgeOUs long wool coats over his nice clothes. So, I thOUght, well, he must be gay... don't laugh. I'm seriOUs... this made me feel more comfortable with the conversation and so I didn't just turn away... I kept putting my stuff on the belt.

The kids came over, put their drinks on the belt, forgot mine, had to go back, so, the lady at the register, he and I were just standing there. So, I turned to him and apologized...

the guy: you don't have to apologize, blah, blah blah

I paid for my stuff, started to leave. I.J. had to go to the bathroom, as always, Mckenna took him into the bathroom, McLaine and I were waiting OUtside the bathroom door/hallway with the cart. So, the guy walks by and as he walks says, "Merry Christmas!" I said the same, smiled and continued arranging the insides of my purse...

that's it, right? WRONG! Now comes the part you won't believe.

We were putting the things in the back of the truck, the kids were getting settled and buckled. I walked the cart to the front of my car like you know, you do... then there he is again. Doing the same, he was parked diagonally from us, cute little black BMW.

We both looked up at the same time and I, in my infinite wisdom (not) say, "we need to stop meeting like this" ha ha ha we chuckled.

Then he says to ME!

the guy: Well, why don't we meet properly then?

I'm still keeping the fake "ha ha ha" going, because in my head I'm saying, "did he just say what I thOUght he said?

THEN, he sticks OUt his hand and says, "I'm Lance."

I do what every other properly raised sOUthern woman does, and say, "nice to meet you, I'm Jennifer" still "ha ha ha-ing because, yOU know, this is kind of weird now, but yet my weird meter is not going off.

THEN! he says...

the guy: It's obviOUs you are busy right now, but maybe we could meet for a cup of coffee?

me: "adowhahdihuh?"

the guy: I'm sorry, I said, wOUld like to meet me for a cup of coffee? Maybe about 4:00 at the Starbucks right on the other side of the building?

uh, huh, yeah...

I cOUldn't believe it either.... I seriOUsly thOUght I was having one of those Candid Camera moments. I just stood there, thinking, is he crazy? What the heck do I look like? Geez, I'm glad I put make-up on. What am I thinking? That whole conversation took about .03 seconds... by the way...

Me: Um, awwww aren't you sweet, I could be your mother! ha ha ha

the guy: Does that bother you? Because it doesn't bother me.

He then smiled so charmingly, I thought, It's the DEVIL!

I said, "well, darlin' I'm married, but thanks anyway." and started to go turn to the car.

the guy: I'm sorry, I didn't see a wedding ring, I didn't mean to offend you.

me: oh, no. I'm not offended... I AM married, but thanks anyway...

And then I walked away. Just like I tell my kids to do when they are in a situation that isn't "right". I just walked away, didn't look back, started the car, left the parking lot.

Now, those of you that know me... what in the world, cOUld that have been? I mean, really????!!!